The Lightly Braised Turnip Consolidated (hereinafter "LBT") recognizes that the news media in recent years has struggled to maintain the news standards of yesteryear. The LBT itself has been forced to confront some of its writers' failure to corroborate stories or invent facts whole cloth. When we discover an error, we do not always correct it if the end result will increase our readership. The LBT retains the right to invent facts for its own financial health. (If your children were hungry, would you not lie for a piece of bread to feed them?)
Due to the above, our editorial board advises readers to corroborate all stories on their own and ASSUME NO STORIES ARE TRUE.
The LBT is a a global, multimedia news and information company with 2011 revenues yet to be determined by accounting staff. (Planned NYSE symbol "LBT"). LBT includes The Lightly Braised Turnip and related properties. LBT operates in Santa Marino, California.
LBT is organized as a limited liability company managed by a corporation all of which is held by a Bermuda-based holding company. All assets -- such as printing presses, computers, and the like -- are held by an undisclosed third-party entity that merely leases these items to LBT. LBT holds no assets apart from intellectual property assets which in and of themselves are held in a living trust to Publisher Mark Mallarde's children.
Our attorneys are ready to take action to protect LBT's legal interests at any time.